Where to start??

I've been so slack lately, you guys have missed out on some really good stories. And the bad part is that they are now purged from my brain and you'll never get to hear them, unless you're one of my lucky co-workers or IM buddies who get to hear my stories sometimes 3-4 times...

Let's see, maybe I'll do an update on each kid and that will include some of their recent funnies.

Charlotte

What comes to mind when I think of Miss C is that she seems to like to blame others for things that they didn't do. The other day, Elisabeth did the unforgivable and smacked Charlotte. Now, Charlotte probably deserved it, but we don't want to encourage sister smacking - at least not outwardly. Being the younger sister, who goes around beating on her older sister without batting an eye, Charlotte earned her Academy Award when Elisabeth smacked her. Tears upon tears. The Charlotte patented pout. Then, the words we would have to hear about 492 times in the next week: "Zizzie mack me. Zizzie mack me!!!"

The event was apparently so upsetting that it haunts her. In the mornings, she will lie in her crib saying 'Zizzie mack me. Zizzie mack me!" Anything that happens to her, boo-boo wise, is Zizzie's fault. Elisabeth can cause boo boos while she is sleeping, at preschool, or probably even if she were 100 miles away. That super hero cape I made her has some serious powers.

Oh and the next episode in the "Charlotte is a Turkey" series is the one entitled "The One in Which She Locks Us Out." Charlotte is a picky little bugger. She wants exactly the right mix of toys in her crib at nap/bed time. You are safer to err on the side of too many things in the crib because extraneous items can easily be de-cribestrated in the pre-nap wind down. Erring on the side of too few things in the crib can be fatal to naptime because it will just work her up into a tizzy.

So we were at the beach this past weekend with Doug's family and I had made the fatal mistake of leaving the blanket and Llama book downstairs (oh the horror, call CPS). Charlotte is able to spread her limbs and prevent you from lowering her into the pack-n-play, and she knows it. So she took a quick inventory of crib items and quickly started hollering "bankee yama bankee yama" while spreading her arms and legs and refusing to get into the pack-n-play. I said "FINE, I will go get your blanket and llama book and then put you in the crib." I set her down and ran downstairs only to hear the door slam. I got the items and went back upstairs... to find the door locked. A few screwdrivers, 4 adults, and a wee bit of irritation mixed with fear later we had the doorknob off and were into the room. Doug then put scotch tape over the handle lock. At that point, our morning wakeup at 5:30am went like this: "Zizzie mack me. Zizzie mack ME! Tape. Daddy. On. Zizzie mack me. Tape. on."

Elisabeth

Elisabeth started Vacation Bible School today. She seems to really like it, I've already heard a few of the songs they taught them and seen her art project from the day. She was disappointed that they didn't get to color, which is funny because she doesn't spend even a minute coloring at our house. Some biblical education will do her some good. Yesterday, in the car on the way home from Lewes, she said - out of nowhere - "Mommy, I know what God's real name is." I said "oh really? what is it?" She replied: "Gopal." I had no response, and all I can hope is that she does not repeat that story to her VBS teachers.

Elisabeth has reached a new reading level - she is now reading me books. I made a deal with her that if she'd participate in the Fairfax County Library Reading Program, which requires her to read 15 books, then she'd not only get their coupon booklet with free ice cream coupons, but she'd also get a very special treat from me. We're still working on the treat options, but she is pretty excited. We picked out some Level 1, 2 and 3 books from the "I Can Read" series that she'd never seen before. She read me a Level 1 book (Diego's Rainforest Race) with no trouble at all. Then she read me a Level 2 book (Arthur's Trip to the Farm or something like that) the next night which required a little help with about 7 or 8 words, but otherwise she read it all herself. I'm all for bribery as a parenting method. As one of the two parenting books that I read said, it isn't bribery if you're convincing them to do something legal.

Oh, another Elisabeth funny - the other day we were reading a Magic Tree House book, Mummies in the Morning. I had to explain what a mummy was. I could see something churning in her little brain. She said, "Mommy, what does Constance call her mom?" (Constance is a British friend). I said, "mummy." She said, "but she's not dead and wrapped in bandages..." No, no she's not. "But whyyyyyy mommy?"

Sorry about the mass update. I have a bunch more posts brewing in there somewhere. Complete with pictures. But we've been traveling too much for me to do much writing!