Thursday, February 7, 2008

Doctor, I think I have a lion in my stomach

One of Elisabeth's favorite games is doctor. She received a doctor's kit from her cousins for Christmas, and we have at least an entire zoo worth of Fisher Price plastic animals. One game is to give the kids who come to play shots, chasing them around while the poor kids almost cry because they want her to leave them alone. There is also the great taking of the temperatures game. You can guess where that thermometer goes. But her favorite game involves her parents as patients, and Elisabeth as the doctor (we have banned the thermometer from this game, you'll be glad to know...) The way the game goes, as per the Boss, is this:

Me (with a Little People camel tucked under my shirt, wailing in pain and clutching my abdomen, ready for my Academy Award): OHHH Doctor, it hurts - it hurts so bad, I think it must be something really bad.

E: Its ok. I think its just a giraffe. Let me listen to you. (she puts the "stellascope" over where the camel is and presses its little button to make a heartbeat noise and then presses it again to make the coughing noise). Yes, yes, it is a giraffe. He has a cough.

Me (earning major brownie points by coughing loudly and continuing to moan in pain): Do you think you can fix it, Doctor?

E: yes, but you have to be quiet. I'll go get my pinchers. it will all be ok. It is just a giraffe.

E: (gets the "pinchers" aka grabby things doctors use to hold onto stuff and proceeds to work diligently to get the offending animal out, all the while I'm screaming in pain only some of which is fake - those pinchers can hurt!!!)

E: Its a camel, its not a giraffe, you been kidding!!! Mommy, your tummy hurt because you had a camel in it. You should feel better now.

Me: thanks Doctor, I do feel better.

E: can we play again? Put this zebra under your shirt.

repeat 20 times until your stomach actually does hurt and your wondering if the doc left a lap pad, or perhaps a plastic lion in there when you weren't looking.

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